Tuesday, June 28, 2005
i like to think of myself as the type of person who never meets a stranger....i love being in big crowds and meeting new people, which has turned out to be a good thing...i was in 8 elementary schools and 3 high schools and enjoyed the quest of making new friends. unfortunately, i didnt get to keep these friends for very long. just as we were beginning to establish the "pack", my family would move. Those of you that read lu, my sis's, blog know that she is totally opposite of me. she has perfected the whole blog concept. me, well lets just say i would rather talk to you sitting on a patio drinking margaritas, in the kitchen, on the couch, in a bar....as for writing about my feelings, memories, or what ifs...seems to be a difficult challenge.
while in the bookstore, "The Secret Language of Girlfriends" caught my eye. i began reading the intro and decided to buy it. i wish so badly for the circle of friends that most people around me have. i would love to meet at a different house once a week with the girls for coffee, cookies, wine, cheese and gossip. i never had the opportunity to make those lifetime friends and share or help each other during that difficult phase of life....teenage kids, mid-life crisis's (recently turning 39 too close to 40), gaining too much weight over the year, divorce, depression.....i would love to be able to tell the girls all my dilemmas and they tell me everything is going to be ok and in the end they were right.
i would love to be able to stand proud with the girls and watch "our kids" play in a basketball game, perform in a symphonic band concert, see their faces when getting that first car, crying with them because "that boy or that girl" broke our baby's heart, prom, graduation, marriage....
two of my favorite movies are the calendar girls and divine secrets of the ya-ya sisterhood. these movies have everything between girlfriends that i so desperately want.
Monday, June 27, 2005
To All the Parents, Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles.....
For those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students...here is something to make you chuckle. Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children.
After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve.
And the first thing he said was "DON'T!"
"Don't what?" Adam replied.
"Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.
"Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit!!!!!"
"No Way!" - "Yes way!"
"Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God.
"Why?" (Adam and Eve)
"Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, wondering why He hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants.
A few minutes later, God saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked!
"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.
"Uh huh," Adam replied.
"Then why did you?" said the Father.
"I don't know," said Eve.
"She started it!" Adam said
"Did not!"- "Did too!" - "DID NOT!"
Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve
should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.
BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!
If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?
THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!
1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 telling them to sit down and shut up.
2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children.
3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.
4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.
5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.
6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.
ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day.
IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: "TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"!!!!!
Thursday, June 23, 2005
Is It All In My Head?
i've had a headache every day this week. i don't get up with on in the morning, i usually start getting one after sitting my office for 10-15 mins. my job can be stressful at times but this week its been laid back and not too much going on (knock on wood). i mentioned this to one of the girls in the office and she told me that a former employee who suffered with migraines (as do i) use to say the same thing....hmmmm
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Answered Call For Duty...
rodney - my best guy pal just informed me that he has to go to guantanamo bay cuba for a year. he will be leaving in september. i know its not iraq but, i miss him so much now (hes been training in arizona) and will miss him even more while in cuba. other than my husband, he is the only guy friend i have that knows pretty much everything about me. i can tell him stuff and know that he wont use it against me or gossip about it. we have so much in common - we like to talk about coffee, beer, liquor, clothes, foreign languages, perfumes, shopping, cooking, motorcycles, cars, movies....hang out at durty nelly's or the fox & hound. oh yeah, he went christmas shopping with shanna (girl at work) and me. we had a blast...the three amigos. rodney be safe and hurry back home to your friends and family....
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Tagged.....Had Fun Walking Down Memory Lane
Tagged by the one and only little sis Lu. Gee Thanks....
What 5 Things do you miss about your childhood?
But first the rules to this meme game:
Remove the blog at #1 from the following list and bump every one up one place; add your blog's name in the #5 spot; link to each of the other blogs for the desired cross pollination effect.
1. The Cerebral Outpost http://thecerebraloutpost.blogspot.com
2. JustaskJudy http://justaskjudy.blogspot.com
3. Loose Leaf http://looseleafnotes.com
4. Lu's News http://luann919.blogspot.com
5. Marti http://marti2212.blogspot.com/
Next: select new friends to add to the pollen count. (No one is obligated to participate).
1. Sleepy Mommy http://sleepingmommy.blogspot.com/
2. This Moms Life http://www.thismomslife.com/
3. Ivy http://www.ivytiedup.com/
4. Helux144 http://only-me-at-home.blogspot.com/
5. Melody http://melslifeinanutshell.blogspot.com
Let the game begin
1. I miss horseback riding with Dad. We would saddle up our horses and ride for miles and miles. One winter we were out riding in a field and I wasn't paying much attention mainly daydreaming when dad came up behind RoEllen (horse) and me and smacked her on the rump. She jumped and I fell off her backwards. Dad was laughing so hard at me. There I was lying in snow on my back. Somehow I had managed to make a perfect snow angel.
2. I miss canning vegetables, jellies and jams with Mom. Although at the time I hated it, but it meant spending an entire day with mom and not having to share her with my sisters or brother (with me being the oldest, I was to help take care of my two younger sisters and brother). When canning season rolled around, I would always fuss about it but deep down inside I was jumping for joy! This meant I didn't have to help watch them but got to help mom instead.
3. I miss living close to our relatives. We use to have a lot of fun visiting them. Uncle Bill taught us piano lessons and had spectacular Christmases. He would decorate like there was no tomorrow and always cooked a feast. He could out do Martha Stewart any day. I also miss hanging out with my cousin Kathy. She and I would get into so much trouble. We would sneak into everything (fools). We would sing, dance, play games and act like two wild and crazy girls.
4. I miss Vickie, LuAnn and me singing and sleeping in the back of the camper on dad's yellow truck . We use to love to sing as loud as could, so loud that we would loose our voices. Our favorite song to sing was "Willie, Willie, Willie Woe, Go Home".....now I don't know where the this song came from or if it exists. The only thing we knew was it was a hit and we had perfected it!
5. Most of all I miss playing out in the woods with Vickie and LuAnn. When we heard dad's whistle, we knew it was time to come in. The closer we got to home we could hear mom yell, "Robin, Vickie, LuAnn, it's time for supper." We started running as fast as we could. We knew a good warm meal was waiting and we would be safe and snug as a bug that night.
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
Not Today, Tomorrow, or Ever
after reading several blogs, i have come to the conclusion that i am not nor will i ever be a writer or storyteller. i do not have the caliber or finesse that others have. therefore, i am embarrassed to call myself a blogger...i definitely have not earned that title. i love the way others can express their emotions, passion and heartaches. to be honest, envy and jealousy has set in. i thank all of you for humoring me by visiting my blog and understand why so many others are much more interesting and stimulating.
Monday, June 13, 2005
Its Monday and Not Raining
generally i hate monday mornings but i feel great today...knock on wood...i was offered a job saturday evening and am considering taking it. the company is going to write a proposal and present it to me within the week. if anything, i'm curious about the offer. i know the docs who are wanting to hire me and it might be worth while.
it rained everyday this past week which i enjoyed (i didn't have to water my plants in the evening and get eaten up by mosquitos) and the yard and flowers look beautiful. this morning i left for work with the sun shining and the birds greeting me good-morning. i enjoy hearing their morning conversations. it is so calming and relaxing.
Friday, June 10, 2005
I'm Not A Copy Cat
i started to read fear on lu's blog. it immediately brought back the vivid memory i just shared...i furiously began typing and relived some of the emotions...i don't think i've ever been that scared before.
please don't think i'm a copy cat. i didn't know what she had written until i went back and read her story all the way through. i called her and asked if she was ok with my post...she is ok with it. neither one us knew that we had experienced the same thing. to this day we still don't know what was in the woods....
The Cabin in the Woods....
i too wanted to explore the cabin for hidden treasures or secrets. I tried to spend a day in the cabin but the longer i stayed there, the creepier it became. the woods would grow very quiet and dark, the animals stopped scurrying around, and the birds stopped singing. the only sounds i could hear was the beating of my heart and breath-fast and loud. I knew, absolutely knew that i wasn't alone.
one day i saddled up RoEllen (my beautiful red quarter horse) and headed into the woods. i wasn't going to stop at the cabin-i was exploring new territory. i turned the horse up a trail toward the cabin. she jerked her head up, spun around a began running-full out back toward the house...something definitely was in the woods and we weren't invited. animals have a keen sense of smell and danger. i was terrified and never wanted to go back in the woods again.
dad, a "Grizzly Adams" kind of guy, was wanting to trap a bear-so, he continued to set traps. unfortunately he had a massive heart attack. while in the hospital and after he got home, he ask me to run his trap lines...my heart sank..but i told him i would.
the traps were to far out to travel by foot. it took a good hour on horseback to get to them. after i got home from school and feed the animals, i saddled up RoEllen and off we went to check the traps. it was a fight just to get her in the woods. on the trail we had to pass near the cabin. my heart was about to beat out of my chest-and RoEllen could sense that i was scared and became a little anxious. i said to her, "it's ok girl" and we trudged onward. by the time we made it to the top of the trail, she had settled down but was aware of the erie silence surrounding us. i noticed the trail had now become narrow, if RoEllen took one wrong step we both would fall off the edge of the earth never to be found..i made it to the traps and Grizzly A caught a possum. it was mangled up pretty bad - but still alive so i shot it. i got the animal out, buried it, reset the trap and headed back for home. it was cold, getting late and starting to snow. i was very nervous and began cautiously heading back down the narrow trail. all of a sudden RoEllen perked up her ears, jerked her head up and came to a complete stop. oh God, please help us. she became jittery and starting dancing around - OH GOD PLEASE DON'T LET US DIE. i yelled "we're coming out and you can't stop us!" i grabbed the saddle horn, wrapped the reins around my hand, and said, "girl let's get the heck out here and go home", then kicked her in the flanks. i know God was watching over us....RoEllen started out in a full run, i didn't look down or back and she didn't slow down until we got to the barn. after that day, i didn't go back to the traps or that section of the woods-and I never invaded whoever was there..space again.
just so you know, dad wanted boys but got three girls instead...i was definitely a "tomboy". Between me and lu, we could out shoot any guy, split firewood, break a horse, shoe a horse...just about anything. Oh, I was the oldest and the official bodyguard. so from time to time i had to beat the crap out of somebody for messing with my sisters. it was more than little house on the prairie...
for the beginning of this story, go to Lu's News, Lu and read "Fear".
finally friday...yee-haw mamma. looking forward to the official start of the weekend. i will be hanging out with friends tonight and go to a froo-froo party saturday night. bought a new dress last night and will buy the shoes tonight!
Other exciting news...lu, my sis will be coming down next week to visit. i can't hardly wait. we have sooooooo much fun together. we both desperately wished that we lived closer to each other and could spend more time together. maybe its a good thing that we don't-we would get into TROUBLE every night. she is a blast to hang with. i am so lucky and blessed to have someone in my life like lu. not only is she my sister but also my best friend. hurry up lu and come see me!
That's What Friends Are For
tonight alissa (my best bud) and I went out shopping then to chili's. we sat at the bar had a few drinks and was taking advantage of the good company. We laughed and gossiped...after all that's what we girls do best.. gossip. I was trying to explain to her the whole blogging thing and this ditsy blonde...i love her to death, could not comprehend or understand the whole blogging concept...i finally gave up...she went to the "little girls room" and my favorite band-DMB was singing satellite (one of my favorite songs). when she got back she said...if i were to blog you right now and ask why haven't you been to the "little girls room" and i've had to go 3 times already what would you tell me... i told her i had a wooden leg and she concluded because i was younger... we had a great time.
Tuesday, June 07, 2005
Colors - by Emily Smouse
The red ink runs from audio, and the blue from a machine.
The messiahs are all wearing black and the glass is tinted green.
The water is discolored and tastes a bit like wine. But it's not red, it's clear instead.
I swear I'm feeling fine.
The rose candle wax is melted all along the floor.
The violet hallway just gets longer when I'm running to the door.
The sky is falling down but all I'm getting is some gray and a little bit of static.
I'm trying to tell you something, but there isn't anything to say.
I could scream it for you.
But I still doubt I'd make any sense.
Emily Smouse is almost fourteen years old and spends her time creating art, listening to music, and IM-ing with friends. She likes to say things to make people think, like: "It's really sad. I hate how people are like grains of sand. Hard to find, and always slipping through your fingers.
Wild Hair or Call Me Crazy - You Decide
well i'm still depressed and have got to get out of this funk! this morning on the way out the door for work, i got this wild hair or crazy idea...how about increasing my antidepressant just a "smidge". i took the prescribed dose, cut one in half and took a 1/3 of it. so far so good - no abnormal symptoms or side effects and walking around in semi-conscience stat of mind instead of a zombie trance.
now i know i will get the "you shouldn't mess around with medicine like that" lecture or the "don't you know that's dangerous" talk but, it's get out of this funk or go to bed for a few days...i can't do that - i've got to work, work, work!
hm...just had a thought....its five o'clock somewhere :)
Sunday, June 05, 2005
Blah, Blah, Blah and UGH
First of all I would like to say thanks for all the compliments on Lu's work. She is very talented.
Been depressed for the past few days and don't want to blog about it....I want to be upbeat and happy and share those thoughts with all. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day....it's MONDAY UGH!